1. Many sizes are compared in life, from shoe sizes, to erm… *cough* But for you, what matters the most is the size of that trusty trowel. That blade, worn down to a bone is a monument to the past year of digging away in soggy wet fields. As an archaeologist, you take so much pride in showing off to your colleagues that circumcised piece of solid forged steel…
2. You guard your tool kit like the crown jewels. Having learnt from experience, that when someone asks on site “can I borrow a pen?”… it feeds the illicit underground trade in stolen site pens.
3. You never follow the fashions.. And why would you? All those wannabe archaeologists pottering around in their “I dug ******** 2008” tshirts. You’d never follow the crowd.. For you, that old cardigan and coffee stained jeans is your idea of archaeological Gucci.
4. You’ve become so accustomed to explaining to your friends that you “Don’t dig dinosaurs” – that their stupidity no longer causes frown lines and wanton acts of dino related aggression on your part. And no, “not like Ross from Friends”….
5. As an academic, you’ve written so many intricate site reports, evaluations and desk based assessments. Unfortunately, such eye for detail has meant that logging into Facebook and seeing that newsfeed, unleashes the angry “grammar police” side in you.
6. You are the “destroyer” of hand shovels. Having never actually read the instructions on their proper usage, you’ve brutally snapped the neck of these innocent metal scoopers.
7. You may be young at heart, and still being able to hold your own in the pub. But years of digging have left you feeling that everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt doesn’t work.
8. Having realised that your career choice in life basically means that you will never own a Porsche, riverside apartment or being able to afford the top table at Jamie Olivers new restaurant, you are resorted to working your way through the entire gourmet collection of pot noodles as your idea of on-site cuisine.
9. The History Channel was once your no1 viewed TV Channel. But there’s only so much Ancient Aliens, Swamp Men, American Pickers and Pawn Stars you can take….
10. You’re the last person anyone wants to sit next to during an “historical” blockbuster movie, such as U571, Last Legion and The Eagle. You’re the sort of person who points out all the script flaws, inconsistencies in the plot and #historyfails.